Discover the Keys to Conquering Depression and Anxiety Mixed: Who are Those who Triumph Over It?

Many people want to discover the keys to conquering anxiety and depression, basically to find the cure to heal them and never have to experience them again. If you have struggled with anxiety and/or depression mixed for a long time, maybe your whole life, the idea that these afflictions can be conquered might sound like a total delusion. I am here to tell you that anxiety and depression can be mastered; the cure is just a matter of perspective. Have you ever wondered who are those who triumph over anxiety and depression? Maybe you actually met someone or followed famous stories of survival. And whilst what we get from them in the stories we share is inspiring, people who suffer from anxiety and depression often feel put off by success stories. But here's the challenge: resist that "yeah, but I'm not like them" thought suggesting they are lucky in some ways and it is easier for them to do what needs to be done to tackle anxiety and depression.

How about instead pausing for a moment and thinking about who they are rather than what they do? And knowing that those characteristics are available to us all human beings.

In a recent post on Instagram, I posted a tip for April Stress Awareness Month and gave myself as an example because I am probably the most anxious person I know...or used to know. After about 20 years of working on myself, I can say I arrived at a place where I can master my own anxiety and it is not the other way around. Don't get put off by those 20 years! You might think: "There it is, a doctor in psychology and she needed 20 years! I don't stand a chance!" Remember my above encouragement: resist the temptation to self-criticise AND build perspective. It took me 20 years because I didn't have the guidance that is available now nor the scientific methods that have been discovered recently, plus society back then wasn't so understanding (not that it is super understanding now, but at least things are getting better).

So who are those who triumph over anxiety and depression? Those who practice these four mental activities:

• self-knowledge - they know their traits, they accept with self-compassion what they don't have or would like to have better, they know their values, they know who they are in relationships too and what their non-negotiables are, they have self-respect.

• self-discipline - those who triumph over anxiety and depression do experience many setbacks, but they pick themselves up and keep going, on and on again; self-discipline is not for those with special talents or strong will; all human beings have the same capacity to practice self-discipline; it's about continuing despite all odds; I always loved Thomas Edison's example - he failed 10,000 times in his work of discovering the light bulb but he kept going until he did it and then he said: "I didn't fail 10,000 times, I discovered 10,000 ways that are not working."

• imagination - they have strong active imagination focused on their dreams, in which they believe; imagination really helps self-discipline too and will ignite your curiosity for knowing yourself; a key issue of depression is that the brain's areas that cover imagination are frozen, which means those who have depression find it very hard to imagine a better future; the good news is that imagination can be under your control and you can choose to imagine a great present and future - do so actively, with intention, it is free and you can do whatever you want in imagination!

• perspective - they put things into perspective and don't accept that there is only one version of a story, let alone that one be the negative side; here it is about questioning and broadening your view on what is happening.

Of course, all the above keys to conquering anxiety and depression sound easier in theory than they are in practice. Self-reflection and a bit of courage to take action can help you conquer these challenges. For some people, this is natural, and we all have the ability to practice all four keys. It is just that for some, this process is more challenging. Have patience with yourself. This is a matter of buildong new habits and that takes time.

If this is difficult, it's okay to ask for a bit of help from a professional. Read more on my blog about how to look when you're looking for a therapist so you can find the right one for you.

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